Girl, You Need To Find a J. O. B.

Enter an amplified state of exhaustion and pile on another coconut shell spoonful of stress... That's right folks, it's job-hunting time. So right now I'm currently at Molly-0 Schools-7. Who would have thought getting a job teaching English would be so darn hard? Well, anyone who had already tried I suppose.
I currently graduated from TEFL International in Oct. Where I gained my TESOL (teaching English to Students of Other Languages) certification and have since made Phuket, Thailand my home. This cozy little island off the West coast side of the Malay penninsula has everything one would want: beach, sun, city atmosphere, night-life, culture, shopping. You name it, it's probably here... Except a job at the moment, and that's where you find me.
It took a lot longer than anticipated to get a CV (or resume' to those in North America) ready and rearing to go. It seemed like every time I thought I had it ready, I would find something else either missing or incorrect. But eventually, I had a nice grouping of seven packets.
I woke up bright and early, but not bushy tailed as the stress of finding a job has left me restless. I rose to the meep meep, meep meep of my little silver-framed alarm clock. It was time to go hunting. I rolled out of bed and groped my cool linoleum floor for my glasses. Clumsily, I put them on as I stagger stepped into the sunlit corridor; its yellow walls intensifying the glow.
By 9 o'clock I was out the door. Just as I had planned. I had my trusty bag filled with CVs and examples of lesson plans I had already done during my training. After some encouraging words from my partner, and reassurance that I looked the part of teacher, I hopped on my silver and black Honda Wave 125 motorbike. Latching my helmet I waved goodbye as I tried to master the art of driving a motorbike with a skirt on. Knees tucked together in a point, I turned the corner and was officially on my way.
First stop, the international school. I had scoped it the night before and was sure of where to go. As I pulled off the pseudo Thai highway of criss-crossing vehicles and obscene honking of horns I took a deep breath and prepared myself. School number one, knock em' dead. I parked my bike and shot a quick glance in the side-view mirror. It was only 9:30 a.m. but the sun gets hot quickly here and I was already sweating around my hairline. A quick fluff and a smoothing of the skirt found me inside the doors of the school. Luckily, the office was right inside the entrance so I popped in, smile plastered on.
"May I help you?" the Thai secretary asked as she and three others attended to a large bulletin sign.
"Yes, I was wondering if you were hiring any English teachers?"
"Um, right now we are fully staffed."
"Oh, okay," I pondered back, a little disappointed. "Could I leave my CV with you in case you have an opening?" The secretary gave an audible groan as she tried to fit my words into a sentence that made sense to her. With a smile she motioned to someone behind me.
"Hello. Yes, we are full at the moment," a teacher using the copier answered the confused Thai's response.
"Alright, well could I leave my resume with you?" I asked cheerily. Great! Someone who could speak English well. This was looking up.
"You should talk to George." She said as she peeked her head around the office door and spied into the hallway. "George, do you have five minutes for this lovely lady?" She asked him aloud. George, however, made no sign of acknowledgement and left me there smiling like a doofus waiting for a response that wasn't to come. "Just go talk to him. Why don't you go? Go on." She encouraged with her spiky hair and metallic eyeliner defining her large eyes. So I did.
I approached him and took the que to sit as he waved his hand toward the table. I anxiously pulled out one of my very best copies of my CV. He looked it over while rubbing his temples. At times during our small talk he would look to the side as if in deep thought. A large man, probably in his fifties, George was obviously the principal of the school. His glasses strung around his neck and higher than thou air about him festering the hallway in which we sat. Was he wondering if I was the right person? Should I have answered something differently? I left with the possibility of a part-time job and and opening of a position next year. Basically, nada. He had my CV. He would call. Uh, huh.
Not letting myself get discouraged I stuck my helmet on and cruised down the dirt road and back out into traffic. Rolling the accelerator back I whipped into the stream of traffic. With a quick toe-tap shift I was into fourth gear and cruising at a steady 80 Kilometers an hour. I finally reached the U-turn opening and took the chance with a slight break in traffic. This was precious time today! I had to land a job. With an inner debate of where to go next, I decided that I should once again improve my CV. Luckily, I was near my TEFL school and since I paid them good money to go there I figured I could go do a quick touch up on their dime.
With new copies of my resume and fixed copies of my diploma, my deflated ego once again returned to normal. The next school on my list was one that my land lady had told me about. I cruised across town and into the neighborhood of where it should have been. Behind dusty industrial trucks and swerving vendor motorbikes, I finally made my way onto the correct street. With my head craned reading passing signs, I found myself at the end of a road leading to the Phuket Solid Waste Disposal Department. Um, not the school. I remembered her mentioning a blue sign and as I turned my bike around into oncoming traffic, I saw it. Well, it was blue but written all in Thai. Here goes nothing. What do I have to loose? Worst case, I find the back entrance to the Solid Waste Department.
As I roared down the street, my head angled to read all the signs, I felt myself take flight. Only after landing the jump off the speed bump did I notice a guard at a gate with yet another blue sign. She had said a blue sign. The guard smirked as I pulled up all knobbly-kneed, my toes pointing to the ground holding my bike straight as I tried to inquire if this was the appropriate building. "Is this a school?" I asked him. He answered by scratching his head. Okay, right. That tells me that he doesn't speak English. Let's try this, "English? School? Office?" He muttered something incomprehensible and I smiled, "Thank you." And carried on my way. If it wasn't the school, I'd turn around. If it was, score. As I approached the first building I saw kids in their tell-tale blue uniforms. Nice one, Molly. Now, Where the heck do I go?
I parked my bike to the side and climbed off. Placing my silver, baseball-hitter's helmet into the front basket (where the Thais usually have their dogs), I gave another quick glance in the mirror and a flap of my shirt to dry the beaded sweat down my back. Here goes school number two. I scanned the building and decided that the second floor may hold some answers as the sign above read: Multi-Language Center. I found myself looking into classrooms and admiring some wonderful craft-work from the students until I reached a doorway with the sign, Foreign Language Resource Library. Hmmm. Potential. Children rushed by me on the stairs as I debated if I should go in. The tinted window only gave hints at what was inside and the shoes lining along the wall were all adults, not like the other rooms with the brown and black school issued canvas runners. A lady came out and I took a deep breath, "Excuse me. Do you know where Lamp is?" (Lamp was the contact name my land lady had given me.) She pointed inside the room. "There?" She nodded and I thanked her as I kicked off my shoes and placed them alongside the others.
Fixing my hair one last time, I pushed open the large door and was hit by the wonderful air-con. I entered a large room where several people sat at wooden desks and shelving filled one side. I had no idea what my contact looked like or where she'd be. I just knew her name. Two people were arguing in front of me and I stood there awkwardly by the door waiting to be helped, but not wanting to interrupt. When my presence could no longer be ignored, the woman turned to me, "Can I help you?"
"Yes, I'm looking for Lamp?" I answered in a very sweet, I'm-very-sorry-for-interrupting way.
"I am her." The short Thai woman answered quizzically. She must have been wondering how the heck I knew her name and why.
"Nee is my land lady and she gave me your name. I am an English teacher. I was wondering if you were hiring any English teachers at the moment." All eyes in the room wee on me. I'll tell you the pressure sure mounts when everyonein the room is evaluating you and not just one person.
"Oh, okay," she smiled, "sit. I'll be right with you." Great. Here I am. This has to be good. I half asked and answered questions in my head, half listened to their heated debate if whether the teacher's test was too difficult for the students as I waited nervously on the brown, leather couch. After their discussion was over she came to me and looked over my CV. By this time I was ready to land this job. I wanted this job. I talked about my experiences in Burlington teaching younger children while also describing my time with older students at the Young Vermont Writers' Conference and TEFL. I shot out examples of teaching, she asked about my hobbies. I introduced my diplomas and certifications, she gave me an application to fill out. She told me about the possibility of a position and would I be willing or able to teach different subjects such as Science. Of course I would. I gave her examples of my lesson plans, and she photocopied them. I even saw one of my former classmates who was now employed there and she gave a good word for me. I left feeling good about the job, but uncertain. I'm still clutching my phone waiting for a call.
It was almost lunch time and I was determined to squeeze in another before I met my partner for lunch. As I was chugging along towards a school I had in mind I glanced to my right to double check that the lane was clear and spotted another school. Ah, hell. I thought to myself. Why not. It's close and I probably won't make it to the other before lunch. How awkward would that be?
With a break in traffic I turned my bike around and entered the gate of the school. Parking my bike on the side and taking another deep breath, I gathered up my bag and put on a smile as I walked towards God-knows-where the office was. I approached an old man in what seemed like an office, " Excuse me, are you hiring an English teacher?" He and another woman to his right exchanged confused glances at each other. Okay, let's try again, " I am an English Teacher. Do you need one?" Nothing. "I have a CV. Would you like it?" My temperature was rising with half embarrassment and the creeping feeling of awkwardness. They looked at each other and spoke in Thai. I stood, once again, like a doofus, smiling. They lead me across the green behind the building. I walked feeling like an outsider (Christ, could I be more of an outsider?) past open windows where lectured students giggled and pointed at me. I was like an Ostrich in a city in New England- quite an odd site.
I was lead to a cafeteria like structure where six teachers sat eating. Oh, God. Exactly what I didn't want to happen. An angry looking Principal shot piercing eyes at me as I was introduced-I think I was introduced- to him. I tried again, "Hello, are you hiring an English teacher?" I asked. All eyes were on me and whispers from the chowing Thais hunkered at the table burned my already red ears.
"English teacher? Yes." He answered as sternly and bitter as humanly possible. He motioned for me to sit at one of the long tables.
"Here is my CV. I was wondering if you needed an English teacher." I said as I handed it to him.
"Ah," he moaned as he placed his specs on his eyes.
"I recently graduated from TEFL." I added, trying to communicate something.
"We have teacher. Come two days one week. N.A. You know? N.A.?"
"No, Sorry. I don't," I confessed.
"In Patong. How long you in Phuket?"
"Almost three months." He got up, throwing my CV onto the table as a line of tee-heeing children donned in green shirts marched in. The made eyes at me. Some hid behind their friends. I smiled back at them while begging to be struck dead by lightning in my head. He returned and told me to follow a different teacher to get an address. I thanked him for his time and followed the man through the line of children. We came to a door where a loud speaker was blaring out instructions in Thai. I waited while he went inside to retrieve the address of N.A. (whatever that was) for me. The first man I had approached came up to me and asked me if I spoke Thai. I told him no, only a little and he laughed. Then he pondered something for a minute into the air and turned to me, "This school...No good. No money."
Wow, okay. "Thank you. Um," What do you say to that? I took it as my cue to leave as I could see the other man hiding inside the room waiting for me to go. As I was saying goodbye to him, two boys approached and he told them to say hi to the Farang. "Hello, Teacha'" one said. The other, the more daring of the two cleared his voice, "Good afternoon," and stuck out his hand to be shook. I shook and replied, "Good, afternoon. Nice to meet you too. Goodbye."
I walked away wishing that I could disappear. Where was that magic fairy dust? I just wanted to shrivel into my shoes and walk unnoticed. As I approached my bike the two boys came running up to me. "For you Teacha," the daring boy told me as he held out a cup of soggy, cold fries drizzled in ketchup towards me. "For me?"
He smiled. "Thank you." I said as I walked to my bike and they giggled off to a bench. I placed them, in the basket under my book bag as I mounted my bike to drive off. He ran back up to me, extending his hand. I shook my head and said, "No, High five!" and slapped him five as I gunned my bike and tore-ass out of there thinking, hey, at least the kids like me.
To be continued...Still to come: The rest of the day. ergh.