When I think of Valentine’s Day, I think of little red, pink and purple construction paper hearts, white doilies and brown paper bag pseudo mailboxes. The Outcast song “Happy Valentine’s Day” plays repetitively in my head like some sort of day-long anthem: “Happy Valentine’s Day/ Every day the 14th/ I don’t think ya’ll heard me/ I just wanna say Happy Valentine’s Day…” It’s a day where everyone indulges in binge chocolate eating, and consciously or not, many people wear a variant of the color red. That’s a damn good holiday if you ask me.
What’s everyone’s problem with the day dedicated to love? The constant whinging on about how it is just a Hallmark holiday is nauseating. Everyone seems to be on a crusade to take down Valentine’s Day. Gangs of disgruntled lovers and those locked into singledom rue the day. They lurk around corners, stomp on roses and spit into cookie batter. They tear off the heads of teddy bears holding faux boxes of chocolate and request tortured songs of love on the radio like J. Geils band’s “Love Stinks”.
Anyone rhyming anything remotely romantic are ostracized, and those staring longingly and doe-eyed at their lover will be taken ‘round back and forced to wear sunglasses. What gives?
Now, don’t think I’m on the side of Valentine’s Day just because I’m happily married – although I’m sure it helps – but I honestly like the holiday. It conjures warm memories of childhood, like wishing Steve Lessard would drop the oh-so-wished-for note declaring his 6th grade crush on me, or filling out specially selected valentines at my kitchen table for friends while my Mother looked on and helped spell things such as, “I like you a wicked lot”.
I mean, what a time! The school day was basically a wash with kids all jacked up on Red Hots® and NECCO’s Conversation Hearts®. Little girls squealed as they read waaaaay to in to what each heart said as if they were some sort of secret message from a crush, and boys tried to act nonchalant about the whole thing, when in all actuality, they probably hand picked each heart. There were parties, activities, hours of scissor use cutting out hearts, and yes, Hallmark cards up the wazoo.
So what’s the big deal? Why hate on one day trying to bring a warm fuzzy feeling to people struggling in a world so afflicted with hurt and hate, crime and war?
It’s that age-old belief that being indifferent and revolting against traditional values is cool. These people who look down their noses at Valentine’s Day see it as a commercial holiday created by capitalistic America, and well, maybe it is, but look at the potential bigger picture. It gives this dirty and dysfunctional world we live in a glow, even if just for one day.
Maybe it shouldn’t be looked at as what you don’t have – but I don’t have a boyfriend/girlfriend, no one took me out to eat at a fancy restaurant, I didn’t get any notes from a secret admirer, there wasn’t a song dedicated to me on the radio this morning – and use the day as a tool in reminding you to be more polite to the toll booth operator, say thank you to a harried waitress, smile at a complete stranger. Instead of expecting, do the unexpected. Imagine if everyone used the day to be reminded of their manners, the heavy burdens of others and became easy going and forgiving – what a day that would be, eh? Oh, that’s Valentine’s Day.
The origination of Valentine’s Day is shrouded in speculation, but reoccurring themes of heroism, sympathy, fertility and romance appear in all, whether you believe that the holiday was formed to celebrate one of the Christian martyrs named Valentine (or Valentinus), or that that it was a conspiracy to absolve the Roman Lupercalia festival. Each legend holds the silver lining of humanity. It was only in 498 A.D. that Valentine’s Day was declared an actual holiday and romance entered the picture when in the Middle Ages, people associated the day with the mating season of birds. Soon after, the first known valentines were sent professing love on the 14th of February.
Sure the commercial obsession with the holiday has muddled the true meaning of Valentine’s Day, but that’s the same for St. Patrick’s Day (beer anyone?), Christmas (presents, presents, presents!!!!), Easter (more candy?), etc. It’s our job as responsible consumers and self-thinking human beings of the 21st Century not to be too easily distracted and swayed by all the glitter and gold of the market. So if you’re one of the people out there cursing the holiday for it’s superficial and obvious failings, I suggest being an individual and looking a little deeper to see it for what it could be, not what it is to the masses.
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